An Awful Dessert

The BCS is a plate of crap. But you knew that already.

This year has been a delicious feast of entertainment. A 12-course, 14-week series of delectable goods and indelible moments, and now we’ve arrived at the terminus of the 2012 college football season. We’ve cleared away our dirty plates from  the last course, and now only 1 section remains: one hell of a dessert.

Okay, actually it’s kind of a crappy dessert for the most part.

As I said, we’ve been eating a great meal this year, and now for dessert, the waiter brings out a plate full of poop. The BCS is that poop, and you don’t want to eat it, but you know you will, and you’ll hate the restaurant for it. You’ll complain for a while, but next year you’ll be back, and they know it.

2012-2013 BCS Bowls 

BCS National Championship Game

#1 Notre Dame vs. #2 Alabama

Although no one can say they’re surprised about seeing Alabama in the title game again (their 3rd appearance in 4 years) Notre Dame’s place in the game came as a surprise to the college football world. The Irish began the season unranked, but powered through a remarkably tough schedule thanks to their top-notch defense, anchored by linebacker and Heisman candidate Manti Te’o.

Sugar Bowl

#21 Louisville vs. #3 Florida

Can we please nickname this the “Everything That’s Wrong With The BCS Bowl?” Here we have Louisville, with losses to Syracuse (in a blowout) and UConn (it’s UConn), but because they are the most un-terrible team in the Big East, they get a trip to New Orleans over teams like…well…pretty much any of the 15 non-BCS teams ahead of them.

Florida making the Sugar Bowl is less of an outrage. After all, the Gators are #3, only lost 1 game in the SEC, and they can in all likelihood hang with any team in the country. However, the only reason Florida made the Sugar Bowl is because they had the fortune of being second in their division. The team that beat them, Georgia, had to play Alabama in the SEC Championship game. The Bulldogs played with serious grit, and were just edged by Alabama in a 28-32 loss. So really, the better team of the 2, Georgia, is going to be playing in a lesser bowl because they had a better season that allowed them to compete for the SEC Championship. Totally fair!

Fiesta Bowl

#4 Oregon vs. #5 Kansas State

Remember when this was going to be the national championship game? Way to go guys, now we have to watch 2 of the most obnoxious fanbases ever argue over which team is going to win their 38th championship or whatever.

This should be a great offensive duel, thanks to the tremendous talents of K-State’s Collin Klein and Oregon’s Kenjon Barner.

Orange Bowl

#15 Northern Illinois vs. #11 Florida State

This is a game that screams lackluster. Congratulations to Northern Illinois, it’s always great to see new faces on the BCS scene, but they’re not deserving. Neither is Florida State, which has done less with more than any other team. The Seminoles had a national championship roster that lost to NC State (a team that got blasted by 5-7 Tennessee, for god’s sake) and was decimated by Florida.

Rose Bowl 

Wisconsin vs. #6 Stanford

Damn it, Big 10. Just damn it. You let WISCONSIN win the conference. At 8-5. There is an unranked team in the Rose Bowl. The BCS system just needs to die a slow, painful death.

Stanford fans, I’m sorry that you have to face the worst BCS team ever.

The BCS makes me hate everything about life.