Dancing Bear Variety Hour, Ep. 2

Episode 2 of our sketch comedy program brings you our take on network radio, our live fantasy draft, and the next installment of our sci-fi series.

“When I was a young’un chasing across the North Dakota cotton fields, I never once I imagined I’d grow up to fly interstellar spaceships for AstroBase. Let alone that they’d make it the subject of a radio-talk dramatization program! Let alone that they’d ask me to write an introduction for the radio drama show they made about me flying interstellar spaceships for AstroBase! All things considered I’d say it’s just swell. And even if they did change anything, they made me seem even handsomer than real life!”

– James Perry, pilot and First Officer of the USS Carpathia

Full episode:

Download this episode for your listening convenience!




Instagram of Dorian Gray, Chapter I

Fine Arts in Radio Theater (F.A.R.T.) presents the opening sequence of the timeless tale, in which famed iPhone portraitist Basil Hallward complete his masterwork: a picture of his muse, Dorian Gray, who pronounces a fateful wish. – Scott Ross

Instagram of Dorian Gray, Chapter II

Ten years have passed since Basil Hallward took his instagram of Dorian Gray. Crossing paths at a coffee shop, Basil is shocked to discover that Dorian hasn’t aged a day, and indeed still wears the youthful styles and works the same job he did as an undergrad. – Scott Ross

LIVE SEGMENT: Listener Emails

Justin, Scott, and Sara field some listener emails about radio work, the NFL, and the afterparty following the first Tallest Building in Topeka Awards.

Time to Wake Up Topeka

Is there any situation more fraught with barely-contained desperation, emotional flashpoints scattered like landmines, waiting to explode with a lifetime of suppressed rage and resentment than the network morning show? The answer is yes: a network morning show in Topeka, Kansas. – Sara Leavens

Sports Yak

We check in with Jay and Bruce to get the latest updates from the sporting world. What do they think about Cleveland’s latest RTR% matched up against Thomas’ CRI/PT ratio? Hit play to find out! – Phil Garland

LIVE SEGMENT: Fantasy Draft

Sara, Scott, and Justin jump on-board the latest craze by drafting their fantasy teams live an on-air. If their rosters are any indication, this season will be an epic battle!

Chopper Claude

High above the city, where individual souls are as indistinguishable and transitory as passing ants, hangs Chopper Claude, bringing you the reports on traffic and man’s futile but ceaseless drive to move ever forward and elsewhere. – Phil Garland

Conan the Egalitarian

Heady from the latest victory, Conan shares what he thinks life is all about… – Justin Wilson

The Adventures of the USS Carpathia in Outer Space

In this installment of our radio space-opera, Captain Derby and Chief Engineer Faye Chinsky visit an alien planet in search of spare parts, and find out just how far you can push casual ethnocentricism. Meanwhil, First Lieutenant James Perry finds an unlikely kindred spirit in the engine room. All this and more in our second episode, “Bazaar Love Triangle” or “So Clothes, and Yet So  Balkovaar”

Act 1

Act 2


Written by Scott Ross. Tune in to the Dancing Bear Variety Hour the second Tuesday of every month at 7:00pm on KJHK 90.7fm.