BY ATTICUS STRALEY
Mac Miller has once again come back into the spotlight with the release of his album “Balloonerism”. Recently published by his estate, it marks the third posthumous album of his, with the contents being recorded back in 2014. While there have been unofficial leaks online for years of this project, it has officially been cleaned up and placed onto streaming platforms. To those who have not previously heard the leaks, this album will certainly surprise them, as this is by far Mac Miller’s most experimental album, heavily incorporating jazz and textured dreamy sounds. Typically, posthumous albums are not always done well, or for the right reasons. “Balloonerism” is an exception. Mac wanted this to be released, and it is beautiful and heartbreaking.
The first full song, “DJ’s Chord Organ (feat. SZA)” sets the album’s initial tone through a euphoric riff accompanied by SZA’s own lyrical lines and overlapping vocals, touching on cocaine and drugs, which is one of the vital focal points of this project. The album sets off with this melodic, melancholic spirit, only to get darker and more vulnerable as it progresses. However, even from the earlier, lighter in comparison records, like “Do You Have a Destination?” and “5 Dollar Pony Rides”, Mac’s drug dependency is shown in every verse. Lines throughout the tracks such as “Still wide awake, I’m a stranger to the daytime, vampire, higher than a hang glider” show the extent to which his usage had damaged him. Other central themes include the directionlessness Mac faced inside himself, shown by repeating the title during the chorus on “Do You Have a Destination”, and highlighting the pollution of childlike wonder by adulthood on “Excelsior”. Along with addiction, Mac seems to speak on death more times than not. Many tragic phrases like “The weather’s nice today, what a perfect day to die”, and “Didn’t think anybody died on a Friday” make it almost seem like Mac had known about his impending death beforehand, as he overdosed on September 7, 2018, a Friday.
While this album is tragic and hard to listen to much of the time, it is also constructed magnificently, as Mac is able to showcase his potential to have been one of the best all-around hip hop artists of his generation. His imaginative imagery shines in lines such as “The moon’s wide awake, with a smile on his face, as he smuggle constellations in his suitcase”, and even in spite of his struggles, Mac’s unbreakable spirit shines through in lyrics like “Enough f*ckin’ around … Open up your eyes, I told you wake up”, as it falls against somber piano keys. Along with the mesmerizing guitar riff on “Stoned”, perfect placement of relaxing drums, and ghostly vocals from his alter ego Delusional Thomas, Mac created something that truly does not sound dated in the slightest.
At the end of the listen, “Balloonerism” reaches its saddest points. On the second to last song, “Rick’s Piano”, we hear the last happy bit of Mac on the album as he faintly cracks some jokes on the introduction. Throughout the song, layered vocals reference his life and music, repeating “The best is yet to come”, partially making this song so bittersweet knowing we will never see this. Along with Mac tragically speaking in a tone that nearly sounds like a farewell to life, the song closes with his vocals singing “I wonder, what does death feel like? … Why does, why does death steal life?”. To me, this was one of the saddest moments on the album. It speaks for itself why.
The last song, “Tomorrow May Never Know”, says it all from the title. The eleven minute and 53 second track gives the closest feeling that we can get to his own mental state at the time of its recording. In my opinion, the record embodies death, with Mac’s last words being “if you could make it go away, give you a chance to start all over”. The second half of the song is a mix of faint children’s voices, Mac’s lone cooing, lost sonar sounds, and haunting distorted drums all echoing into a void, getting quieter and quieter. The track ends with over a minute of an isolated phone ringing, never to be answered. It honestly feels like Mac created the song knowing it would probably be his last ever heard. While it is genuinely something else, it is also one of the best outros I ever have heard on an album.
To me, this album is a “what could have been”. Mac Miller was such a talented artist, and had a phenomenal career still ahead of him. This album was proof that even years before his passing, he had a grasp on music as a whole differently than most of his peers. If this truly is the end of his discography, I think this album does a great job of gifting fans one more listening experience, while simultaneously maintaining his legacy in a dignified and respectful way. Mac’s life and “Balloonerism” serves as a warning to the dangers of drugs, and that no matter how famous or rich, no one is invincible, and we are all human.